"I really had no prior emotional preparation for reentry. I knew it would be different, but I was in no way prepared for the feeling of BEING different."
"One adjustment that caused me the most trouble and grief was the amount of loss and change" "I don't think I'll ever have a complete sense of belonging here in America, or for that matter, overseas, because I've been split in two culturally." "The whole value system here seems completely opposite from my own."
"I have found that only MKs can understand MKs and fully comprehend their loss due to separation....parents try, but they cannot understand just how deep our loss realy is."
"I didn't have much of a homelife as far as living with my family goes because I spent most of my time in a dormitory for MKs while my parents worked way out in the province." "I know I have the American face, but I don't feel American"

More Voices
An adult MK who continues to search for a place to belong shares
a very intense dream she had after she began therapy:
I found myself in a morgue. It was clear that all the people around me were dead, but I knew I was not dead. I was alive! I said to the morgue workers, 'I don't belong in here. I'm alive! I'm alive! Their reply was, 'But there is no place for you outside.' 'But I don't belong in here.' I said. 'I'm not dead! I'm alive! I want out of here!' They replied, 'but there is no place for you out there.' At this moment the door to the morgue opened. My mother entered and said. 'I will take your place.' 

A Missionary Child from Nigeria:
One adjustment that caused me the most trouble and grief is the great amount of loss and change I was forced to experience suddenly. the only thing that did not change in my life was a few pieces of clothing and a few articles that I brought with me to America. Everything else in my life was either altered or completely lost...Everything like people, places, food, clothes, language, culture, family, relatives, friends, cars, climates, school, the dorm system, nature- everything! It was almost as if I was (and I believe I was) dealing with thousands of deaths at once, including my own. When I left, I really left everything except my body in Nigeria.

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